Taking One for the Twitter Team.

Guys, I have to start sleeping with New Lad again.

I don’t WANT to. But I do want him to shut the fuck up about Grand Theft Auto V on Twitter. Really, you haven’t done anything else worth mentioning for the last 2 weeks? Including three posts before the game even came out?

Lemme fuck you and give you something else to talk about. I’d rather you tweet about getting laid WHILE I’M ON TOP OF YOU than read one more update about this game.

True, I could just delete him. But if I just sleep with him, he’ll do something else besides play video games and I’ll have someone to spank me. It’s a win for us all, really. AND for his other Twitter friends, because NO ONE wants to read about that.

Smug Singleton: Saving the Internet, one orgasm at a time.

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