My online-dating horror stories include three different dudes who were doggedly interested in butt sex (see what I did there?) and the subtleties therein (and there?): “Not at all? Not a finger? What about tongue?”
And one guy, within his first five messages, offered me an impressively vivid description of how he’d pleasure me orally. (Which, hey, yay for enthusiasm, but Jesus, give me a little “lady” leeway. I’ll probably let you do that on a first date, but not on first email — it’s called class?)
Anyone else have any good stories, or have your friends had any noteworthy adventures? If it’s too awful to post publicly, email email@example.com.