“May I be excused? I seem to have the plague.”

Sick Singleton. Fuuuuck everything except tea, blankets, and drugs.

This is why I hate people. I was unemployed for almost a year and not one germ found me. Working for a month, interacting with humanity — bam, plague.

If I die, tell that one guy that never sleeping with him is one of my only regrets. That, and the time I got bangs. So it’s a pretty big deal.

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