Pop psych and ice cream metaphors.

What the hell is this nonsense where men are listing their lettered personality types (ENTJ, etc.) in online dating profiles? I’ve seen at least 50 profiles with it.

The only abbreviation I want to see in a guy’s online résumé is “GGG.”* Don’t make me Google your special snowflake shit — use your words. A lot of them say things like, “I’m ENTJ, if that matters.” It doesn’t. To anyone. Knock it off. I will get to know your personality through conversation; that’s kind of the point.

* “GGG” = “good, giving, game,” meaning you do any naughty little thing I ask, and I’ll do the same. But my kinks are fairly tame. It’s not like I’ll ask you to bring leather and chains. I’m vanilla, but I’m like the vanilla with little flecks of bean in it. So…understated, but also reliably delicious and very adaptable.

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