Sweet Cherry Pie

I had my annual lady exam this morning, and this time chose to have it done at Planned Parenthood. I figured letting them bill my health insurance for basic care would be far more helpful than that broke-ass $25 I donated. Run alllll the tests!

They did a really quick HIV test, just a finger stick, that came back negative before I was done my visit. (Good work, Science!) And I got to swab my own vagina for the chlamydia/gonorrhea test, so that was a fun little “choose your own adventure” for my lady-bits.

And just as a finishing figure of speech, when she was done the exam, the doctor said, “OK, beautiful!” Which is a lovely thing to think of your vagina. My business is showroom tight, y’all.

Anyway. I am infinitely amused that this all took place on National Cherry Pie Day, AND it’s Friday, so obviously we should all be gearing up for the weekend by rocking to shitty 1990 jams.

“Tastes so good, make a grown man cry…” Goddamn right.

Happy weekend, you guys. Have some cherry pie — metaphorical, literal, or hopefully both.

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