Zen and the Art of New Moon Nachos

Note to self: Go to yoga. You like yoga. You need yoga. 

Ahem… I SUPER don’t want to go. It’s “New Moon yoga” at 7:45, but because I am 100 years old, that might as well be midnight. 

Can’t I just welcome the new moon, like, at home in yoga PANTS? 

Besides, the new moon already happened this month, and I honestly don’t even know what a new moon signifies. I know it’s about cycles, so…does it have to do with my period? When you Google “new moon,” “Twilight” movies come up, so fuck the new moon.

How ’bout I just go home and make new moon nachos? Nachos are HELLA zen. I bet I can find all my inner peace with nachos.

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