…Goddammit, I hate everything.
Man, bitches, though, amirite?
Have any of you ever been placated by a fucking frosted lemonade? Screw you, Chick-fil-A. Make it chocolate salted caramel and replace the wedding dress with the magically evasive unicorn of a tall boot that zips over my giant hamhock calves, and then MAYBE you’ll sell me something.
Smug Singleton 
I feel your tall boot pain. I wanna wear them so badly, yet my mutant calves will not allow it. 😦
Seriously. I don’t get it, and it seems to be a very common complaint.
You would think someone out there would realize there is money to be made from people like us. At least, I would think that…