Today’s OkStupid intro message: “You got pretty eyes n nice smile go with it :)”
1. Pfft, I knew that. I have my bad body image days, but I actually like my eyes and smile. If I hate my face, it’s usually my nose or my skin.
2. Go with…what, exactly? Having those features? Yeah, I pretty much have to — they’re on my face. Unless I get color contacts and cosmetic dentistry, these are the eyes and smile I’m gonna roll with.
3. Do you mean I should go with YOU? Where? Back to third grade to learn grammar? No, thanks, Billy Madison. (Alternate joke: “Where, the 7-Eleven on Broadway? Do you even know my name, screwboy?”)