My friends are mental Wonderbras.

This is the online photo of another swimsuit I bought, and I texted a friend a photo of how it looked on me…

Me: “I’m sending this back. I don’t even know why I bought it. I’m gonna be standup paddleboarding and shit — I need something sportier. But damn, I look CUTE.”

Friend: “You look great and you should keep it and wear that shit every time you go near water.”

Here’s to friends who are more supportive than bathing suits. 🍸

Do I have time for a breast reduction before vacation?

I ordered swimsuits online so I could try them on and suffer privately, and perhaps call my therapist.

And I love knowing before I even open it that my breast is not fitting in there.

That’s adorable, though. You tried.