All I’m sayin’ is, your tits are bigger than mine, sir, so if I’M not allowed to be topless in public, YOU shouldn’t be, either.
Via Reductress: 5 Selfie Angles You’ll Use Just to Show Off Your Boobs
Dear Everyone Who’s Told Me I Should Watch My Crazy Ex-Girlfriend,
I am so very sorry I didn’t listen. My entire life is canceled until I’ve seen them all.
Sincerest apologies from me and my heavy boobs,
At the same time…respect…
P.S. I saw a link for a porn parody of this over the weekend, but could not bring myself to click to watch Fuller Holes, even under the guise of “research.”
Quotable friend: “I need to contain my breasts somehow when I sleep. Otherwise I worry I’ll give myself a concussion.”