Missing the (Hall)mark

*girl in my office gets Valentine flowers*
 
“Awww, I want flowers…” *pout*
“Do you want to actually DATE a man so he’ll send them to you?”
“Oh. Um…nah, I’m good. I’ll just buy my own flowers and skip that side of bullshit.”
 
Happy Valentine’s Day, my lovelies! 💕
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You can just fuck right the hell off, actually.

This was Facebook’s suggested post for me today, so if you’ll excuse me, I’m-a go find me a window to jump out of. Not because I’m dying alone, I’m fine with that, but because this bullshit exists.

Capture

You said “avoidance” like it’s a BAD thing…

I went to therapy last night, and only just now realized I completely forgot to bring up the thing I’d been meaning to discuss, and we ended up on some other bullshit entirely.
 
Me: “Well, if I forgot, it must not have been THAT important.”
 
Also Me: “Or you’re becoming an expert in avoiding uncomfortable topics.”
 
First Me: “You can fuck right the hell off. That is an undervalued life skill!”
 
🙄
 
I’ll make a note for next time.

“Hippies, hippies…they want to save the world but all they do is smoke pot and play Frisbee!”

Some days all the hippie feely stuff I follow on Facebook makes me feel better.

And then some days it’s like, “Hey, you know what, Special Snowflake? Shut the fuck up with your groovy bullshit.”

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Bookworming my way out of bullshit

When your family is coming to visit and you go around the house to collect all the books you’re reading and hide them in the bedroom, because it’s basically just a list of eight conversations you don’t feel like having today, plus the fact that “you read too much” and “have too many books — ha ha ha, hoarder” has somehow been a truly hilarious running joke for them since your childhood…

#issues #SuckItNowIGetPaidToRead