Friend with Children: “Is the movie kid-friendly?”
Me: “I mean, *I* think so, but I also first heard Denis Leary when I was 10, and had Freddy Krueger nightmares well into my 30s because I saw that movie around age 8, so let me double check online…”
Hm… And HOW old was I when I found the VHS porn and that book about the G-spot in Mom’s room?
(Explains a lot, doesn’t it?) 🙂
“I rarely see children. I’ve organized my life in such a way, I never have to talk to or be around a child.”
— Bill Maher (sorry)
Today I learned that there’s something particularly gratifying about taking my birth control pill while babysitting.
Like, “Not today, Satan!” *glug*
I know what they MEANT, but what I read was, “Mommy found out she was pregnant and realized she needed to stop drinking and get her life in order.”
Oh, damn… Well, that was just a whole buncha stuff in my body that simultaneously twitched.
I am suddenly both horny and maternal.
It’s awkward.
So far my favorite part of #TakeYourChildtoWorkDay are the notifications from all my child-free coworkers who are also opting to work from home.
I feel like my well-rested face and disposable income convey this well enough, and yet I DO love me a shiny trinket…
(I should clarify that none of the parents I know personally look tired.)
Via Glamour: Actress Melissa Rauch Announces Her Pregnancy and Reflects on the Heartache of Miscarriage.
“‘Miscarriage’ by the way, deserves to be ranked as one of the worst, most blame-inducing medical terms ever. To me, it immediately conjures up an implication that it was the woman’s fault, like she somehow ‘mishandled the carrying of this baby.’ F that so hard, right in its patriarchal nut-sack.”
I just saw this photo on Twitter and it made me happy in a way I don’t even fully understand. 💕
Via Raw Story: Prominent feminist writer drops off social media after rape threat against her 5-year-old daughter.
YOU ARE WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS.
Honestly. The FUCK ails you? How do you even have time to do this? I have shit to DO. Go to work and get out your mama’s basement, shitheel.
In all seriousness, I’ve been wary of posting certain things here. Not that 46 followers are going to garner me much hatred, but the page IS public. I actually just found out a friend was reading who I didn’t know was reading, and I’m a little weirded out by it. Apparently I’m totally fine telling strangers about my vagina, but I get ishy when it’s people I know?
But anyway, once you start threatening to assault children, I give less than one iota of one fuck about your rights. I hope the FBI investigates your ass. Literally.
Smug Singleton 