Girls, I must warn you…

OMFG…

I can’t get this wet in the ocean.

(I stole that joke entirely out of context from Greg Behrendt, but it is thoroughly and blue-ballsingly appropriate on this occasion.)

In which I gaze intently at my navel.

I have no idea what’s going on in my brain this weekend, but it’s been a steady steam of tiny realizations, making me immensely grateful for the relationships (friend, family, romantic) I have and how they’ve shaped me as a person.

Also a lot of, “Why do people think this way about me?” “Well, because sometimes you act that way, and you never tell anyone when things bother you. Maybe try that?” If that fails, some classic advice from Greg Behrendt: “When you are around an asshole, it is your responsibility to LEAVE. You cannot wait for them to get better.”

And a dash of wondering if *everything* I’m doing with my life right now is the wrong choice. So that’s always a good time.

Could I NOT have a lifetime’s worth of introspection in 3 days? I know it’s a 3-day weekend, but goddamn, brain, work with me here. Can’t we just sleep late and clean out closets like normal people? Do you have to think this much?

Quotable insincerity

“We have become a sloppy bunch of people. We say things we don’t mean. We make promises we don’t keep. ‘I’ll call you.’ ‘Let’s get together.’ We know we won’t. On the Human Interaction Stock Exchange, our words have lost almost all their value. And the spiral continues, as we now don’t even expect people to keep their word; in fact we might even be embarrassed to point out to the dirty liar that they never did what they said they’d do.”

— Greg Behrendt