I’m sure you’ve seen quite enough of this on your Facebook feeds this week, so I hate to add to the bullshit. But the combination of characters I thought of made me laugh.
“Describe yourself in three fictional characters…”
Seen in an OkCupid profile: “I am definitely a stereotypical academic in the sense that I love wearing corduroy blazers and holing up in ivory towers.”
*blink* OMG. Take me, sir. Take me hard.
The only things we have in common are burritos, mushroom hatred, High Fidelity, and grammar, but let’s be honest, I’ve based relationships on less. I dated a guy for 8 months because we could both quote George Carlin.
Plus, another of his favorite movies is Josie and the Pussycats, so he clearly also enjoys dumb, fluffy things.
Hello, Professor. I will be your dumb, fluffy thing.
Reasons I’ve Clicked “Pass” on OKCupid Profiles: Entertainment Missteps Edition
— He doesn’t read. One guy in particular blew my entire mind when he said, “i don’t read much. I’d like to fix that but its hard to start reading when you dont read much.” Um. No, it’s not. At all.
— He lists “Footloose (circa 2011)” as one of his favorite movies. How dare you, sir?
— He said “The Hangover was superb.” The Hangover was fine, but that sentence tells me you have terrible judgment either of movies or of words, and I cannot abide either.
* Subject line from High Fidelity, by Nick Hornby.
Smug Singleton 