Nerd Girls Aren’t Easy, or Doc-Cock-Block

Perhaps a good first-date policy would be to see your intended’s Netflix queue BEFORE you say, “I’ll watch anything you want, except documentaries — ugh.”
You hear that? That was my legs clamping shut, and there they shall remain. Kudos, sir — now we’re actually going to WATCH the movie. You might as well have said, “I’ll do anything you want, except learn.”

It’s not like I’m watching documentaries daily, but the only movie genre I’ve sworn off so sweepingly that I *wouldn’t* watch it next to someone I was trying to get with is a few categories of porn.

I suppose I’m glad we got that out of the way up front. But tread lightly, douchebro. Tread lightly.

In which I am a hypocrite…

I think the reason I’m not buying Tina Fey as the Garnier haircolor spokesperson is that I like to think of Tina Fey as a magical unicorn of a woman who is so awesomely self-assured that she doesn’t give her hair that much thought. She’s too busy being smart and funny, and a hero to nerd girls everywhere.

This is absurd, because I do realize her hair doesn’t just look like that when she rolls out of bed. Nerd girls deserve fabulous hair, too. And I’m glad a gorgeous, smart, funny lady is selling me something for once, but it’s just not working for me.

I may also just have Garnier trauma after the Orange Hair Incident of ’06. You could get Jesus as your spokesperson and I wouldn’t believe Him. But since Tina Fey is basically my Jesus, I guess it’s the same idea.