When I told my therapist I was having a hard time getting myself to respond to OkCupid messages, even when I WANTED to, and I went over my previous experiences with online dating, she said, “Well, yeah, that makes sense. If you’d tried ice skating 10 times and ended up breaking an ankle every time, you probably wouldn’t be too excited to try again.”YUP.
They changed OkCupid’s messaging, so I often don’t see first messages for a few weeks. Today I encountered this one.
There a few different directions it could be headed. I’m curious, but not so much that I’ll reply just to find out.
This is a man’s answer to one of the sex questions on OkCupid, and I want to write to him solely to ask what the WRONG moment/conditions would be.
Outside of “during sex,” when/where else do you think I’m doing that? Do you think I can just do it spontaneously, like…in the supermarket? Because a) I can’t, but also b) Yeah, I can see how people might frown on that. That’s pretty rude, plus it fucks up your pants for the rest of the day.
The first thing you see in an OkCupid profile is a “My self summary.”
Just saw a guy whose first and only line read: “I’ve been called a modern day Renascence man…”
Iiiiii…BET you haven’t.
Sooo… You’re saying your plan is a padded room?
At the end of his first OkCupid message, responding to a particular line in my profile, a man asked, “Why don’t you like Cuddling?”
Um, why don’t YOU like boundaries, fuckface? All the other things I said, you’re gonna start in with some shit right off the top?
I have things to DO, sir. I don’t have time for cuddling (or, in fact, “Cuddling”).
Ahem… See, this is why I don’t actually date, but DO go to therapy.
(In defense of my intimacy issues, what I actually SAID is, “I’m not a big fan of cuddling.” I have ADD, dude — I get bored.)