Family Sighs

Hey, guys? Crisis averted — my stepsister assures me that “It’s OK to be single.”

I guess she’d know, ’cause she stayed with that alcoholic for 15 years that time? And then got engaged a guy who’s not divorced yet but she still had his babies?

It’s good to know my whoring jezebel lifestyle is approved by such a paragon of fine decision-making.

Not to mention the cousin who brags about never eating vegetables or wearing sunscreen, is married to a guy she hardly speaks to, and refuses to help care for our grandparents, but continues to ask why I don’t have kids yet. (She has three. Because children are our future.)

The song “We Are Family” was clearly written by masochists.