Chris Christie and the Curious Incident of the Lazy Fat Joke

Yup. This. There are a million other things you could joke about. Going after his weight is just lazy. It’s the easy joke when you can’t think of anything intelligent to say, like when I talk shit on the Mets like I know dick about baseball.

And fuck everyone who makes me defend this motherfucker, by the way. It’s like that time I had to write about the dipshits who criticized Snooki’s body “post-baby.” C’mon, man. That’s not the way I prefer to feel dirty.

~

“And this offends you as a Jewish person?”

“No, it offends me as a comedian!”

Seinfeld

Zero to Snooki in 3.5…

A guy on OKCupid emailed me and said he was surprised to find a “culturally aware, well-read woman” from my hometown.

At first I wasn’t sure what to do with that. Uh…thanks for the…”compliment…?”

I decided it reeked of pretension and ignored him. But the subsequent swearing in my head had a Jersey accent.

(One of the reasons I started hating New Lad was because he talked shit on my hometown. ‘Ey. Fuck you. You’re a Mets fan, man, go fuck yourself.)