I love how they’re making cuter plus-size swimsuits, but can you cut it out with the string-held open backs? Baby got back fat, bro — those strings would disappear into the trenches.
I’m preliminary swimsuit shopping for my April vacation, and even on the curvy-chicks, we-need-underwires, our-models-have-an-adorable-hint-of-backfat site, I want to jump out the goddamn window.
It’s February. This layer of fat is keeping me warm, thankyouverymuch. I will be a quality buffet if the apocalypse happens — I am marbled as FUCK. And I’m also SUPER good spending my life in these oversized sweats. HMPH.
Via Philadelphia Magazine: Jennifer Weiner Smashes Your Swimsuit Fears With Awesome Facebook Post.
I know I’m basically obsessed with Ashley Graham at this point, but… but…
C’mon, y’all, godDAMN.
Notes to self:
— Obtain first bikini
— Go to beach
Via ET Online: Plus-Sized Model Ashley Graham Rocks Tiny Bikini in ‘Sports Illustrated’ Swimsuit Ad
Choose your own snark:
1. If you need me, I’ll be slamming my head into a wall.
2. I don’t even really have time to comment on this. I’m too busy packing and booking a flight, because if she’s “plus-sized,” I’m clearly the queen of England, and my people are probably wondering where I’ve been.
Not snark: “‘I know my curves are sexy and I want everyone else to know that theirs are too. There is no reason to hide and every reason to flaunt,'” Graham says in a statement.”
Goddamn right, girl. Go on with your bad self.