I’m doing that thing where you write a text but then delete it without sending it because you’re too cool. But then I write it again. And delete it again. Because I’m cool.
I’m not cool, you guys. I’m a goddamn spaz.
(Have we taken “spaz” off the politically correct table yet? I feel like we should, but Paulette called herself “spastic” in “Legally Blonde,” and we all know “Legally Blonde” is basically the law. So I’m allowing it.)