Pity pity princess

I could not give any less of a single flying fuck about Kate Middleton’s baby. I can’t imagine being pregnant and having everyone being all up in my womb like they’re trying to climb in and meet the kid.

And sure, sure, congratulations, miracle of life, etc., etc. But honestly? Big deal — I’d let a British prince come inside me, too.

(This attitude is one of the many reasons I’ll never land a prince.)

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