I’m not sure, but I think a man just mansplained another mansplainer to me, and now my head hurts.
They changed OkCupid’s messaging, so I often don’t see first messages for a few weeks. Today I encountered this one.
There a few different directions it could be headed. I’m curious, but not so much that I’ll reply just to find out.
This seems like a perfectly rational response to a Facebook post by my fit, attractive local meteorologists.
But seriously, 9 miles? On your DINNER BREAK?! Go fuck yourselves. You ain’t right. Do you not KNOW about tacos?
Text to a friend: “I didn’t know that was weird until my therapist told me.”
This should be the title of my debut novel.
This is a man’s answer to one of the sex questions on OkCupid, and I want to write to him solely to ask what the WRONG moment/conditions would be.
Outside of “during sex,” when/where else do you think I’m doing that? Do you think I can just do it spontaneously, like…in the supermarket? Because a) I can’t, but also b) Yeah, I can see how people might frown on that. That’s pretty rude, plus it fucks up your pants for the rest of the day.
Yesterday I wore skinny pants, except I’m NOT skinny, and then I had Chinese food, and then I got puffy, aaand now I have this…fat-rash above my belly button where my tummy was trying to escape my belt.
Honestly, I don’t even know how y’all deal with how sexy I am.